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When It’s More than Writer’s Block
Uncategorized · writing · Writing FUNdamentals

When It’s More than Writer’s Block

Bran Lindy AyresLeave a comment

Writing While Mentally Ill

As a writer have you ever gone back and reread an old work and thought, ‘Wow, who hurt you?’

The last few months I’ve been working on writing the sequel to one of the first books I ever wrote and published. It’s been proving to be exceptionally difficult. There are no less than five different versions sitting in my hard drive. And this latest attempt is yet another rewrite. Yet again, the story seems to be fighting me at every turn. I knew going in that the main character is mentally draining to write. But that hasn’t felt like it’s been the case recently. It’s felt deeper than that.

After a convo with my sprint partner a couple of weeks ago, I did some thinking and came to a realization. 

(Trigger warning for discussion of suicidal ideation, depression and suicide attempt.)

Where it Began

When I first started writing this book, I was a new mom and on strict bed rest due to nearly dying during delivery. I didn’t realize it at the time, but I was suffering from rather severe postpartum depression. In order to deal with my emotional turmoil, I began writing. I created a character who I could put through all the torment I felt I deserved. This poor boy was aptly named Sorrow. He became my vessel for all of my insecurities and trauma I’d endured growing up. It helped for a time.

When my middle child was almost two, I attempted to commit suicide at work. This led to a hospitalization and finally a diagnosis. But it would be another five years before we found a mix of medications that help keep me balanced mentally. I’ve been through therapy. I had a relapse and went back into the hospital for a short time. My lovely psychiatrist helped me learn coping mechanisms. I still have bad days, but I no longer sit and daydream about dying or about how much better off everyone would be if I was gone. I’ve continued to write. I still love tormenting characters, but not to the degree I did to Sorrow.

So when I realized last week the reason this story is fighting me so hard, it was a surprise but also a relief of sorts. 

I can no longer write Sorrow the way I did. I no longer want to hurt myself and by extension him. I deserved better and so does he. In light of that, I’ve decided to take the sequel in a totally different direction than I’d originally intended.  I won’t spoil it here for you. ^_~

Staying Sane as a Mentally Ill Writer

Writing is mentally taxing, no matter who you are or what you write. At some point or other, nearly every writer deals with the dreaded writer’s block. That seemingly insurmountable hurdle to keep putting words down on the page. And every writer has their own way of dealing with it. However, for a writer who is neurodivergent (I use this term as I feel it is more inclusive and has a less negative connotation than the phrase mentally ill) it can be especially frustrating.

For me, anxiety and depression can combine to create a perfect storm of feeling both upset I can’t get anything down, that I’m disappointing my readers, and conversely, feeling like it wouldn’t matter anyway as I’m nothing but a fraud trying to trick people out of their hard earned money. 

Ouch.

That’s not true. Of course it isn’t true. But my serotonin starved brain likes to insist otherwise. This is when I have to be especially gentle with myself.  Following are a few things that I’ve found help me when I’m in a slump and ways I’m working to avoid them in the first place.

My biggest piece of advice is this: pain and/or suffering doesn’t not make a person more creative or a better artist. The whole concept of the tortured artist needs to die a fiery death. Health doesn’t define who you are and it shouldn’t define you as an artist either. If you are struggling, get help. I became a much better person and writer once I got help and learned to harness those demons instead of letting them run rampant.

Being neurodivergent doesn’t automatically make my writing deeper or more relevant than a neurotypical author’s work. In some ways, it can be less relatable to the average reader because of my perspective.

Here are six ways I’ve been trying to help myself:

  1. Seek Professional Help

    My first piece of advice is to get help. If you are struggling with symptoms that make day-to-day living a challenge, please talk to your doctor. I will also list various resources for you at the end of this article. The Suicide Prevention Hotline literally saved my life. 

    1. Practice Mindfulness

    Try to stay self aware. If something you’re working on is making your symptoms worse, it might be time to pull back and think about why this is the case. This is especially true if you’re writing about a neurodivergent character. As the article Tips for Writing With and About Mental Illness states: “Suddenly, you’ve stopped arguing with mental illness, and you’ve started collaborating with it.Writing about mental illness can sometimes become a conduit for mental illness” (Wortmann, F. (2021, September 10). Tips for writing with and about mental illness. Psychology Today. Retrieved October 13, 2024, from https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/triggered/202109/tips-for-writing-with-and-about-mental-illness).

    1. You are More than Your Illness

    Just as you are not solely your illness, neither is your character. While at times it can feel all consuming, it is only one part of our whole selves. And not everyone will have the ability to understand our character any more than they can understand our experiences. Some things simply have to be experienced to be understood. 

    1. Take Breaks

    If your current work is making your symptoms worse, don’t be afraid to put it down and walk away for a bit. Work on something different. This is why I like to have several projects going at once. It gives my brain a break from writing emotionally challenging characters to write something lighter. Or I refill my creative well by reading, watching movies or gaming. It is all part of the process and don’t let anyone tell you different.

    1. Try New Things

    If writing has become truly challenging, it might be time to try a new creative outlet for a while. Allow yourself to explore other mediums. This can also relate to #4 in that it gives your brain a new challenge and can actually help you when you get back to your writing.

    1. Don’t Isolate

    We tend to withdraw when we’re struggling. This is the last thing we should be doing. This is when we most need to reach out to others. Even if it’s just joining some writing sprints on a Discord server or going to a local writers group meeting, do something that involves other people.  

    You’re more than welcome to come join my server. We typically do sprints together on Saturday and Sunday evenings. https://discord.gg/4uPCWEFRJp  The Novlr website also has a community tab and a Discord Server.  They hold writing sprints through the week. (www.novlr.org). Scribophile is another great website if you’re looking for help and feedback too. (https://www.scribophile.com/) 

    I hope you find these points useful. If you have your own methods I would love to hear about it in the comments!

    Here are some useful links from the National Institute for Mental Health :

    Call or text 988 or chat online  to connect with a trained crisis counselor. The Lifeline provides 24-hour, confidential support to anyone in suicidal crisis or emotional distress. You can reach a specialized LGBTQI+ affirming counselor by texting “Q” to 988 or by calling 988 and pressing “3.”

    If you are a veteran, consider using the Veterans Crisis Line.

    Call 988, then press “1.” You can also text 838255 or chat online . The Veterans Crisis Line is a 24-hour, confidential resource that connects veterans with a trained responder. The service is available to all veterans and those who support them, even if they are not registered with the VA or enrolled in VA healthcare.

    Learn more: Veterans Crisis Line  (disponible en español )

    Disaster Distress Helpline. Call or text 1-800-985-5990. The Disaster Distress Helpline provides immediate crisis counseling for people experiencing emotional distress related to any natural or human-caused disaster. The 24-hour, confidential helpline offers interpretation services in more than 100 languages.

    The following professional organizations have directories or locators on their websites for finding mental health professionals:

    National advocacy organizations provide information on finding mental health professionals, and some have locators for finding a therapist on their websites. Examples include:

    
			
    

			
    
					
    
	
	
    
			
    

    

			
				

    
	
    
		
					Uncategorized		
		
    Commissions Now Open
    
					
    
				 Bran Lindy AyresLeave a comment			
    
			
    

	
    
		

    Writing commissions? Yup, writing commissions! Ever wanted someone to flesh out a character for you, write you a very specific short story (smut welcome!), help you with a D&D character background, write an engaging Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook post when you’re up to your eyeballs in social media? Well, I’m your writer! I have 20+ years of experience writing both fiction and nonfiction and have been on Facebook since it was still locked to college students 😛 So yeah, I know a thing or two about working my way around social media. If you’ve followed my blog or if you wish to look back in the archives, you’ll get a good feel for my style of writing.
    




    To claim your spot visit: https://ko-fi.com/767GCI8VAT6
    




    For your social media I will need to know:
    1) Subject
    2) Tone. How do you want to sound (cheery, informative, irreverent)?
    3) Examples of other posts so I can match your wording and voice.
    4) Audience. Who you’re trying to engage with this post.
    5) If you want any media included (this is an upcharge).
    6) Timeframe. When do you need the post? There is an upcharge for same day.
    




    For your social media I will need to know:
    1) Subject
    2) Tone. How do you want to sound (cheery, informative, irreverent)?
    3) Examples of other posts so I can match your wording and voice.
    4) Audience. Who you’re trying to engage with this post.
    5) If you want any media included (this is an upcharge).
    6) Timeframe. When do you need the post? There is an upcharge for same day.
    




    For me to craft your personalized fiction story I will need to know:
    1) Genre, I am happy to write in most genres though horror and humor are not my strong suits.
    2) Type of characters including gender identity, sexual orientation, and any personality traits you want them to have.
    3) Plot, short stories tend to have simple plots. Let me know if there is anything specific you want to be included.
    4) Length. How long of a story would you like?
    5) Special requests. Have a specific thing you’d like included, just let me know and I’ll work it into your story.
    




    For your social media I will need to know:
    1) Subject
    2) Tone. How do you want to sound (cheery, informative, irreverent)?
    3) Examples of other posts so I can match your wording and voice.
    4) Audience. Who you’re trying to engage with this post.
    5) If you want any media included (this is an upcharge).
    6) Timeframe. When do you need the post? There is an upcharge for the same day.
    




    Most short stories will take 3-5 days to complete. Anything longer than 5k words will generally take a week to 10 days. All commissions are free for personal use. If you would like full publishing rights it will be an extra fee of $30 per commission.
    




    Get your spot now before they’re gone! Visit https://ko-fi.com/767GCI8VAT6!
    
			
    

			
    
					
    
	
	
    
			
    

    

			
				

    
	
    
		
					Uncategorized		
		
    Clearing out the Cobwebs
    
					
    
				 Bran Lindy Ayres2 Comments			
    
			
    

	
    
		

    Well, it feels good to be getting back into the swing of things. I’ve let my mental health issues get the better of me for a while now and I’m digging my way back out of that. 
    




    So, I don’t know how many of you know but my wonderful publisher Less Than Three Press officially closed their doors last month leaving me once again out in the indie wilderness. I’ll be honest, it hit me really, really hard. I found myself wondering if I could have done more, promoted my books more, paid more for advertising, just over all worked harder to have done something to keep them from closing.
    




    I was blaming myself for their closing. Something I had literally no control over. But a voice in my head kept saying it was my fault. Then today Jami Gold shared this thread (I highly recommend reading the full thread):
    




    Here’s what I’m thinking about today: What squatters are living in my brain, not paying rent, wrecking the place? Bc yesterday I bought a flowery pink shirt at Marshalls and immediately thought… BUT I NEED TO LOOK TOUGH. WEAR BLACK. NOT BE GIRLY. And that thought? Squatter. 1/— Delilah S. Dawson (@DelilahSDawson) August 10, 2019
    




     I found myself reading about someone who sounded exactly like myself even if my reasons for my ‘armor’ are different. My mother was the polar opposite, (begging me to be more girly, to do my hair, to wear dresses, to put on make-up), but the results were the same. Just like Dawson, I have ‘squatters’ in my head. 
    




    What so many call their ‘demons’ or ‘baggage’ – squatters. Squatters with snide hateful voices that would do anything to make us doubt ourselves.
    




    Where I live, if you squat on a property for 7 years, you legally own it. Unfortunately a lot of us have unintentionally let our squatters come to ‘own’ real estate in our minds. We can’t evict them, so we must learn to live with them and minimize their impact on our lives.
    




    It doesn’t matter whose voice the squatters have, our parents, a teacher, some other authority figure, a false friend, the result is the same and we have to work hard to overcome the ingrained negativity. 
    




    I am 41 and just now realizing where some of my squatters are from. 
    




    But not every voice is a squatter. 
    




    Learning how to listen critically to our own inner dialog is a lot like learning to lucid dream. Plenty of people will give you advice on how to do it but ultimately, its down to persistence and practice.
    




    So when I started hearing that voice in my head telling me I’d failed LT3 it took me a few days to realize it for what it was. It wasn’t me. I hadn’t failed anyone. I’d written and edited and worked my butt off. They didn’t fail either. They chose to close before it would have been a mess. They gracefully bowed out of an industry that has become more of a cesspool than a creative breeding ground. I respect them greatly for it.
    




    But this leaves me back at square one. A whole new square one from when I first started writing.
    




    Part of me loathes the idea of approaching publishers, but I also don’t know if I have the energy to take up self-publishing again either. No many agents will look at LGBT outside of contemporary romance (if you know of anyone looking for queer spec fic please point me in their direction!).
    




    But … I don’t want to stop writing. I’m not going to stop writing. 
    




    No matter what the squatters have to say about it.
    
			
    

			
    
					
    
	
	
    
			
    

    

			
				

    
	
    
		
					asexual · book review · Books · mogai · Uncategorized		
		
    Book Review: Perfect Rhythm by Jae
    
					
    
				 Bran Lindy AyresLeave a comment			
    
			
    

	
    
		
    This past week, October 22-28, was asexual awareness week.
    

    

    Asexual Awareness Week is an international campaign that seeks to educate about asexual, aromantic, demisexual, and grey-asexual experiences and to create materials that are accessible to our community and our allies around the world.
    

    

    Asexuality is not a widely known orientation so when I realized Holly Drummond in Perfect Rhythm identifies as ace, I was absolutely thrilled. And a little worried.
    

     
    

    51hkkc5gpul-_sy346_Pop star Leontyne Blake might sing about love, but she stopped believing in it a long time ago. What women want is her image, not the real her. When her father has a stroke, she flees the spotlight and returns to her tiny Missouri hometown.
    

    In her childhood home, she meets small-town nurse Holly Drummond, who isn’t impressed by Leo’s fame at all. That isn’t the only thing that makes Holly different from other women. She’s also asexual. For her, dating is a minefield of expectations that she has decided to avoid.
    

    Can the tentative friendship between a burned-out pop star and a woman not interested in sex develop into something more despite their diverse expectations?
    

    A lesbian romance about seeking the perfect rhythm between two very different people—and finding happiness where they least expect it.
    

    Thankfully, I didn’t need to be. Jae is a fantastic writer and I’m so glad I grabbed this book. I saw a promo for in on Tumblr and the mention of a lesbian from my home state of Missouri piqued my interest. Granted, I’d never read contemporary f/f before and I wasn’t certain what to expect.
    

    What I got was a lovely, blossoming relationship between two amazing women. When I first started I braced myself, unsure if I’d be able to connect with Leo Blake, the main protagonist. I needn’t have worried. She is wonderfully down to earth and relatable for a pop star. She’s stubborn and full of pride but not so much that she won’t admit mistakes or try her best to rectify things that have gone wrong.
    

    While I love Leo, Holly was the one I really connected with for obvious reasons. I really appreciated how Jae handled Holly’s asexuality, including being frank about how pressured we can feel in relationships.
    

    So many parts of this book hit home for me and not just the setting. It was refreshing to read a story where the asexual character wasn’t ‘fixed’ by having sex or ever pressured into the act at all. I also greatly appreciated the content warning before the chapter that had a sex scene in it.
    

    All the characters were wonderfully fleshed out and made the whole journey with Leo and Holly that much more interesting. I loved having plenty of time to get to know them. I know a lot of people call this a ‘slow burn’ romance, but it is still fast-paced by my standards. xD
    

    Overall, I delighted in reading this book. It was thoughtful, funny and moving.
    

    
			
    

			
    
					
    
	
	
    
			
    

    

			
				

    
	
    
		
					movie review · Uncategorized		
		
    Movie Review: Warcraft
    
					
    
				 Bran Lindy AyresLeave a comment			
    
			
    

	
    
		
    warcraft_teaser_posterI don’t review movies too often, there are so many reviewers out there and I know how much I disregard reviews myself. I rarely ever agree with critics on movies. Everyone has their own tastes, same with books or video games.
    

    I’ve actually had the opportunity to see several movies in the theaters this summer, something that rarely happens for me. I’ll tell you something that might surprise you: of everything I’ve seen this year so far, Warcraft is by far the best movie.
    

    Before you laugh your way to the unfollow button, hear me out.
    

    I saw Civil War and while it was good it lacked so much that would have made it great. It felt rushed and the characters manhandled into their roles.
    

    I suffered through TMNT2 and it was everything you should never do in a movie. (Some one please rescue Megan Fox from Massive Bastard and give her some real roles please). There was little to no character development and the plot was so thin as to be transparent. The cartoon had more plot and characterization in 20 minutes than that entire movie.
    

    Which brings me to Warcraft. I played the game a few years after it came out, but not religiously like some. I left a while back and just never got back into it. So I came into the movie with only a few loose memories and no major expectations.
    

    Within the first 5 minutes I’m blown away. It’s both epic and intimate. There are massive sweeping battle scenes that had me holding my breath and private moments so painfully intense I was in tears. I forgot I was watching a movie.
    

    The best part? These characters really truly felt alive in ways that no other movie this year has accomplished. There was more characterization of Gul’dan in the first 3 minutes we meet him than Casey Jones got in the entire TNMT movie. This holds true for the rest of the large cast.
    

    Where Civil War fumbled handling multiple character viewpoints, Warcraft excels and draws us in and shows us how both sides are much more similar than they ever would imagine. Each character had their own moment to shine but never at the expense of the plot. One of my favorite aspects was how the women in the movie were real, concrete and had agency.
    

    So much credit goes to both the actors and the VFX people for making the orcs feel so real, and—dare I say it—human. Too many times I get distracted by the effects and get pulled out of the movie. This was not the case here. It was a beautiful meld of real and CG that only enhanced the story.
    

    I can’t say much more without spoiling it but I will be seeing it again.
    

     
    
			
    

			
    
					
    
	
	
    
			
    

    

			
				


			
				

    
	
    
		
					Uncategorized		
		
    Mundane Issues
    
					
    
				 Bran Lindy Ayres2 Comments			
    
			
    

	
    
		
    you-are-not-a-duckIf anything is guaranteed in life, it’s that nothing is guaranteed. You have to eek out time to write, and time for more mundane activities like cleaning and pretending to be a functioning adult. This week has been full of irritating mundane issues for me, which is why I’m having to put off my next Going Over the Rainbow article for a bit.
    

    I won’t bore you with the details of my circumstances but I do hope to be back as soon as possible.
    

    Here is a fun video that’s been helping me get through this week. ^_^
    

    

    The Jeweled Dagger CoverSpymaster Lafayette Goddard knows better than to trust anyone in their line of work. Now they sit in prison with information that could save the Queen yet they cannot bring themselves to trust the new Captain of the Royal Guard. Even if it means losing everything they’ve worked so hard for.
    

    All Captain Jasper Stanton ever wanted was a chance to prove himself. Mistakenly imprisoning Lafayette isn’t how he planned on distinguishing himself. Now he must try to win the former spy’s respect if he wants cooperation investigating the conspiracy.
    

    The secret to finding out who is plotting to kill the Queen lies with Lafayette’s mysterious informant known only as the Jeweled Dagger. The closer Jasper gets to Lafayette, the more he wonders just how much is being hidden from him.
    

    Available now on Amazon and Smashwords.
    

     
    

    How do you handle situations when finding time to write seems impossible? Do you have suggestions for allotting time for writing when you’re not at home and cannot follow your normal schedule?
    

    If you enjoyed this post and would like access to exclusive content please consider supporting me on Patreon.
    

     
    
			
    

			
    
					
    
	
	
    
			
    

    

			
				

    
	
    
		
					Uncategorized		
		
    Release Day and Book Giveaway!
    
					
    
				 Bran Lindy Ayres7 Comments			
    
			
    

	
    
		
     
    

    We’ll get straight to the good stuff! Just comment below with your email address  to enter the giveaway. I’ll be choosing 2 Amazon gift card winners, 2 ebook winners and 2 signed print copy winners today using random.org. There is no purchase necessary to win.
    

    You are also welcome to join me on Facebook for the online release party. I’ll also be on Skype all day and you are welcome to come chat with me there as well (my name is sorrows fall and I’m in MO, USA).
    

    Floors of elegance (2)
    

    

    Genderfluid spy Lafayette Goddard knows better than to trust anyone in their line of work. Now they sit in prison with information that could save the Queen yet they cannot bring themselves to trust the new Captain. Even if it means losing everything they’ve worked so hard for.
    
All Captain Jasper Stanton ever wanted was a chance to prove himself. Mistakenly imprisoning Lafayette isn’t how he planned on distinguishing himself. Now he must try to win the former spy’s respect if he wants cooperation investigating the conspiracy.
    
The secret to finding out who is plotting to kill the Queen lies with Lafayette’s mysterious informant known only as the Jeweled Dagger. The closer Jasper gets to Lafayette, the more he wonders just how much is being hidden from him.
    

    

    Get your copy now. Available in print and as an ebook on Amazon and on Smashwords.
    

    

    If you read and enjoy (or not) please consider leaving a review! I’d love to know what I got right and what I need to work on!
    
			
    

			
    
					
    
	
	
    
			
    

    

			
				

    
	
    
		
					Uncategorized · writing		
		
    An Open Letter to My Local Writing Group
    
					
    
				 Bran Lindy Ayres21 Comments			
    
			
    

	
    
		
    I want to preface this by saying; I bear no ill will, animosity or hard feelings toward anyone. I am simply sad and disappointed. I had hoped we might learn from each other. Yet, I guess my hopes were naïve.
    

    

     
    

    Writing can be so lonesome. You sit at your desk, hour after hour, day after day and stare at a screen or a piece of paper. Some days it feels as though no one could possibly understand the difficulties that come with writing. This is why I was relieved, and a bit apprehensive, about joining the group. I tried out the group write-in first and found it amazing to be surrounded by fellow writers. It was an epiphany. I did not have to do this alone. There were others locally I could get together with for coffee and lunch and moan about my current manuscript and they would understand and possibly offer advice. I started coming to the monthly meetings. I met amazing people and made friends.
    

    Then I got up the courage to bring a chapter for critique one weekend. I should have known beforehand that no one wanted me there. Whenever we’d introduce ourselves and state what we write, the disapproving and at times disgusted looks when I said I write gay romance had me wondering why I bothered. But I wanted help, I wanted to be a better writer. I should have known that a critique was asking too much. Out of a full room, 2 people commented. Did I have a right to be disappointed? Perhaps. I tried to console myself that maybe it was good enough that no one else had any advice for me. I knew it was a lie.
    

    After that fewer and fewer people would speak to me. I finally quit going. What was the point of a writers group when everyone but a handful of people pretended I didn’t exist?
    

    That was months ago. In September I went to the convention put on by the group. It was fabulous. Except for the fact that I felt as though no one really wanted to talk to me. A select few did but for the most part I was either ignored or conversations were ended quickly. At the time I’d put it down to limited time for breaks. Now, I’m not so certain.
    

    I’d affixed a sticker to my badge stating that my preferred pronoun is ‘they’ as I am nonbinary (neither male or female) and being referred to as ‘she’ is disorienting for me. Now, I can’t help but wonder if that sticker was the reason for the abruptly/awkwardly ended conversations.
    

    I had been contemplating returning to the group as I learned a lot about the craft and did enjoy the atmosphere. I won’t be returning.
    

    It has become clear to me that persons such as myself are not welcome and not just because I write about something other than male/female romance. I understand that many of the members find anything other than heterosexual relationships to be offensive and ‘sinful.’ I never sought to make anyone uncomfortable either with my writing, comments or my own orientation and gender identity. I had hoped that being a group of writers I’d find people more open and accepting of others, people willing to learn and grow, people who understand that inclusiveness and diversity are the cornerstones of literature. Perhaps in the future it will be.
    

    For now, I will wish you all the best and sincerely hope you learn to be more accepting and inclusive in both your writing and your personal lives. I’m sorry I cannot include you in mine.
    
			
    

			
    
					
    
	
	
    
			
    

    

			
				

    
	
    
		
					Characters · lgbt · mogai · Uncategorized · writing		
		
    Going Over the Rainbow: The Gender Divide
    
					
    
				 Bran Lindy AyresLeave a comment			
    
			
    

	
    
		
    

    Most of us go through life never thinking much about our gender or how we express it. We might feel it is something we were born with, something absolute and  immutable. We might think there are only two genders and that we are one or the other.
    

    ‘But aren’t there only two genders?’ I hear you asking.
    

    Nope. Male and female are only two ends of a vast spectrum. Also it helps not to confuse gender with sex. Sex is biology/physiology and even then there are intersex persons whose bodies are not clearly one or the other.
    

    “When we think of gender, we often think of male or female; that’s only half of understanding gender. The denotations of male and female actually refer to biological and physiological sex. Gender is a sociological construct of values, ideals, and behaviors about what it means to be either male or female, and are often regarded in terms of masculine or feminine, respectively. Many people use sex and gender interchangeably, but one does not have to be male to identify as masculine, and vice versa.”
    

    -Boundless. “Context of Culture and Gender.” Boundless Communications. Boundless, 21 Jul. 2015. 
    

    In addition to exploring the sexual orientations in the coming months we’ll be looking at different gender identities . We’ll discuss gender identity and expression and how you can use these to make your characters more diverse.
    

    ‘Why? Can’t I just have my character be male or female?’ You ask.
    

    Of course you can but you’re here so you’re obviously interested in being more diverse in your writing.
    

    The Culture of Gender
    

    Ripley, the main character in Alien originally was to be male.
    

    Have you ever thought about how your favorite book or movie might have been different if the main character had been a different gender? What would have made it different? Why?
    

    In our society (I’m speaking as someone who lives in the US) identifying as male or female comes with a host of gender specific expectations: men are macho, women are feminine, men don’t cry, women are emotionally compromised, men like cars, women like shoes, ad nauseam.  These gender stereotypes are social constructs and have little basis in biology or psychology.
    

    “Gender theorists point to the variations in gender roles observed among different cultures in arguing that gender – our masculinity or femininity – is a social construct rather than an innate biological characteristic. Because there is no universal “right” way to be a man or a woman, they argue that our ways of “doing gender” are shaped by social cues and influences.”
    

    –Dr. Abby Palko
    

    This is why we as writers need to be more cognizant of the variety around us.  Challenging these stereotypes can help us broaden our social consciousness and that of our readers.
    

    ‘But why should I worry about gender when I only write men or women?’ You wonder.
    

    Because even cisgendered persons, or persons whose gender identity aligns with their gender assigned at birth, are impacted by society’s gender culture and expected to conform to certain norms. It’s not enough to  throw a bunch of ‘masculine’ traits into a character’s personality and call her a ‘strong’ female. And conversely taking a female character and switching to masculine pronouns won’t give you the sensitive male you are looking for. They each will have skin-deep traits and no real depth to them.
    

    Sex and Gender: A Cross Cultural Perspective
    

    It’s my hope that you’ll find the following articles interesting and maybe a little enlightening as we study the wide variation of genders and sexualities and how we can accurately write these identities.
    

    If you enjoyed this and would like access to additional content, please consider supporting me on Patreon. 
    

    Do you struggle writing a certain gender? Why do you feel that is the case? Have you ever written a character and then decided to change their gender? What prompted the change and how do you feel it turned out?